I will just cry and continue life as is
Because I've always do it that way
I have a system of "helping" others, in the sense where I am, and will be occupied
This is bad behavior, I guess
Because I'm just running away from my problems
Thou I am the problem itself
So what should I do?
What could I do?
Should I do anything?
I am the box, the lid, the cat, the hand
Yes, I'm never going to find peace as how everyone close around me is
I'm not worthy of peace
I was peaceful only because of the mask I wear
the mask I wear when I'm around people
I am scared now, of the roof falling over me when I'm chilling in my room
Because of the recent winds and thunder and rain, the window closing in by itself when the winds gust
My heart stomps quicker when I feel vibrations in the walls and floor
When it's probably just a cat or a neighbor walking
Thou it's not recent
There are things building up to where I am now, to how I feel now
It's all just me
It's always just me
I'm just like that
as fortunately and unfortunately as it is
I will feel emotions and will talk myself out of it
and it happens again and again
Just as how I would expect I can face greater fears, I react worse as days gone by
Maybe I'm not meant to face these challenges and conquer them
Maybe I'm just meant to break into pieces
And into smaller pieces
And slowly I glue myself back to how it was
But the cracks shall not fade
The cracks will crack and be even more fragile
Is this how it's going to be? And will be?
I don't know
No one knows
